How To Survive The Social Media Minefield

It seems like (because it’s true) every time I sign onto Facebook, I’m hit with a friend’s baby announcement.  Or an adorable photo of a friend cuddling sweetly with their tiny human.  Or the bright, smiling face of a toddler, sitting up, waving his/her arms at Mom behind the camera. Cue dagger in my heart.  As I quickly shut the app on my phone and, usually, switch to instagram (which I’ve made sure greets me with fashion, home decor, and positive affirmations) I go through the same process of emotions - First, the sharp heartache, followed by longing, then comes the happiness & love for my friend and her beautiful family, and finally the thought, “Come hell or high-water, I will have that someday.”

When there is something you want so badly in your life, going on social media is basically the online version of walking through an emotional minefield.  Proceed at your own risk!  There are so many conflicting emotions when you see people you love (as well as those you don’t) experiencing what your soul so badly desires, or worse, what you came so close to having.  This of course applies to any situation in life.  For example, if you’re single and not loving it, divorced, working towards a career advancement, or waiting for your time to start a family - you can undoubtedly relate.

Here are some different things I do to stay sane:

  1. Focus on your path.  Remember that each person has their own story and is on their own path.  What is happening for them has no impact on what is happening for you.  That’s their life and this is yours.  

  2. Send them love.  You may never know what they’ve gone through to get to where they are today.  And you don’t know where they are going.  Everyone has a struggle or two in their story.  Maybe this is their victory, and isn’t that awesome?!  

  3. Distract and redirect.  What projects need tending to at work?  Is there someone you owe a call back?  Look up recipes for dinner, start googling ideas for your next getaway, check your class schedule at your fitness studio, make plans with someone who makes you feel good.  There’s so much life to be lived this minute.

  4. Find gratitude.  Make a quick mental note of what you do have going on in life that fulfills you.  Big or small - a sunny day, your favorite coffee, your Mom, your dog, those new shoes, your paycheck - everything is fair game.  

  5. Trust the universe.  Visualize what it will be like when you achieve what you desire.  How will you feel then? It will happen in the way it is meant for you, when it is meant for you.  

  6. Have no shame in setting your bar high.  Change the dialogue in your head to positives. Instead of thinking “I almost had that,” or “What if it never happens for me?,” think “That’s what I want for my life and I deserve it.”  

  7. Send yourself some love.  This shit is hard.

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